Seattle/Oly Saturday

This Saturday was truly fantastic! I had the day completely off . . . no school, no work, no babysitting gigs, nothing. I decided the ideal way to celebrate would be getting up at 6am to go get my tires replaced. Yep, I sure know how to party. Actually, I just wanted to make sure I had time to get the tires replaced AND go to brunch with Kristine and Megan AND get down to Olympia in a timely fashion. It actually wasn't so bad . . . I dropped the Rufus (yeah, my car is named Rufus) off and spent a couple hours wandering around chilly, sleepy Ballard (I get Rufus's maintenance done at the Ballard Firestone . . . FYI, they've always done a really good job and I highly recommend them). Here's a couple of things I saw during my wanderings:

The Ballard Sip and Ship: A coffee house/post office. It wasn't open, but it looked really cute, so I googled it just now. Apparently, they serve Batdorf and Bronson coffee/espresso, as well as sandwiches and pastries, and also run a full-service post office and sell cards, gift wrap, and knicknacks. I've never heard of anything like that before; I will definitely be checking it out soon!

Carnegie's, a restaurant/bar in an old Carnegie Library building. So cool! I am definitely going there sometime!

So anyway, my original plan for my walk was to end up in Cafe Besalu, but it was too far and I was too cold, so I ended up popping into a Tully's instead. I had some coffee and hung out for awhile, and just as I was finishing my coffee Firestone called to tell me my tires were done, so I headed back, got the car, and went to meet Megan and Kristine for brunch!

We drove to Belltown and went to the Bang Bang cafe. It was excellent! Tasty, healthy, inexpensive breakfast burritios, lots of vegetarian options, but some meat stuff, too, if you're into that, and good coffee. We met the owner (well, Megan and I met her; Kristine already had), and she was really nice and friendly. Plus, it's just cool to go into a restuarant and the owner's right there, taking orders and making drinks just like the rest of the staff. Plus, she remembered Kristine on sight, which is pretty impressive considering the amount of people she must see every day.

After brunch I took off for Olympia, and spend a cozy, rainy afternoon with my aunt and cousin at RC Ridge. I've been going to RC ridge since I was a kid, but I still have trouble describing exactly what it is to people. So there's this married couple, two really awesome people, and quite a long time ago they built this big treehouse type thing in the woods in Olympia. The husband takes photographs in his studio in the basement (it's where we've gotten all our family pictures done since I was little). Upstairs, there's homemade rootbeer, soup, and other delicious goodies. There's also a shop with beautiful jewelry and other treasures, and wonderful company and conversation. The wife (I don't know if she'd like me sharing their names on the internet so I'll just call her "The Goddess" since she jokes that her husband's the boss, but she's the goddess) is like the ultimate hostess . . . she introduces everyone to everyone else, makes everyone feel comfortable, welcome, and loved, and organizes crafts/parties/treasure hunts from time to time. RC ridge isn't open to the public; it's just friends, and friends bring their friends, etc. Most of the time when we go there we don't get pictures done or buy anything, we just hang out. Today, everyone was doing collage valentines -- making collages from magazines and putting them on little doilies which the Goddess then hung on the windows. It was so much fun . . . they are lovely people and I was so glad I got to see them today.

After RC Ridge came a deliciously fattening Red Robin dinner and then I drove home. Now I'm sleepy, and happy, and not especially excited about a day of studying and work tomorrow . . . today was like a mini-vacation, and I'm not sure I'm ready for it to be done.

A Possibly Very Exciting New Plan

Tonight, I went to the HCASB participant information session, to speak about my experiences as a participant last year. I was in a hurry to get in there, speak briefly, and get out . . . I was hungry, had been busy all day, and had a fair amount of studying left to do. When I heard that a representative from Teach For America was coming to speak at the end of the meeting, I groaned inwardly. There was no polite way I could sneak out early, it was too small a room, but I had no interest in sitting around and listening to somebody talk about something that had no relevance to me. Sure, I've seen the 3838238290 signs that TFA puts up around the UW campus periodically, and I'd sometimes even thought "Hey, if I wasn't going to medical school, that'd be pretty cool. But I am going to medical school, which is 75 times cooler." Basically, TFA recruits college graduates, trains them, and sends them into low-income, underachieving public schools to teach for two years. They publish a lot of stuff about the huge disparity between low-income and high-income schools, as well as the disparities between the futures of the students at those schools. I'd always thought it sounded like a great, well-intentioned program, but, as I said, something that simply wasn't relevant to me or my plans. But a combination of the presentation this guy gave tonight and just the wheels turning in my head changed my mind.

This guy specifically talked about Teach for America as an option for aspiring doctors. He spent two years working for TFA, and is now starting medical school in the fall. He talked about how a lot medical schools are partners with TFA, and will offer a two-year deferment (they accept you, and hold the spot for you for two years) while you work for TFA.

It wasn't that his presentation was mind-blowingly amazing or anything; he talked for a maximum of five minutes (which was good, because, although I was actually interested, I was still hungry). It was just that he pointed out a couple of things I hadn't heard before, and those couple things got me thinking.

I used to be absolutely terrified of the idea of not being in school. I think I thought that if I veered off the direct path toward my goal for even a minute, I'd somehow lose momentum and never get there. I'd become a different person, I'd forget how to study, I'd become less smart . . . yeah, it really didn't make sense. Last school year, for financial reasons, I had to become an in-state student, which meant taking two quarters part time and then one quarter off. Shockingly, I did not come back stupider, quite the opposite actually. I didn't do anything extraordinary that year, mostly I just worked a lot. But I learned, lived, and grew, and had just as many valuable experiences to show for that year as I would have if I'd spent it in school, maybe even more.

So anyway, now I'm picturing myself done with medical school, or maybe in clinical rotations, seeing my first patients. I will (hopefully), be clinically skilled and well-qualified to treat them. But people need more than that from their doctor. Empathy? Well, I'll try, that's for sure. But how much will I really know about the communities they come from or the circumstances they face? How much will I really know about anything that wasn't published in a textbook I had to read? Maybe some . . . I like to think I have slightly more life experience than my average peer. But that still isn't much. But now, say I had spent two years working with children from the same type of community where I want to practice medicine? Meeting their families, hearing their stories, learning what their lives were like and what issues they dealt with on a daily basis?

If I spent two years working for Teach for America, I'd be 25 when I started med school instead of 23. There was a time when that would have seemed like a huge deal to me, but it just doesn't now. I'll be spending a gazillion years in med school and residency anyway before I'm a full-fledged doctor, what's another two? I wouldn't lose anything. And I might gain knowledge that made me more able to relate to my patients, to better understand what they need, how to reach them, how to explain things to them, etc., etc. I might be a better doctor if I do this, and that in itself would make it 100% worthwhile. Also, not the most important issue, but TFA teachers make approximately $47,000 per year. That's not a fortune, but it would mean I actually started medical school with some savings, instead of virtually none. It might mean I wouldn't have to join the military to pay for medical school. Spending two years helping children who truly need help sounds a lot better than selling myself to the military just so I can enter my chosen career. After all, the reason I want to be a pediatrician in underserved communities, the reason I even decided to become a doctor, is that I want to dedicate my life to helping people who really need my help . . .

. . . I have no idea if I will actually pursue this or not, but it's an option that is on the table that wasn't before tonight. I love having options! I am so grateful for my youth and for the privileges that have been generously given to me . . . so grateful that I have choices, and that I have time to make them. :)

Photos from: http://lobellovida.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/pediatrician.jpg and http://www.educator.com/news/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/teach-for-america.png

"When we were that young, we invented the world, no one could tell us a thing . . . "

. . . that quote is from Audrey Niffenegger's Her Fearful Symmetry, which I read over winter break. I read like crazy over the break; for the most part, I don't let myself read for pleasure when school's in session, since once I get really into a book, I often literally cannot stop myself from reading until it's done, no matter what time it is or how much homework and studying I have to do. So on breaks, I make up for lost time and read whenever I can; I believe I finished three books over winter break this year!

Anyway, Audrey Niffenegger also wrote the very popular Time Traveller's Wife, which was made into a movie. For those of you who've read The Time Traveller's Wife, Her Fearful Symmetry is VERY different, but, in my opinion, every bit as good. The Time Traveller's Wife deals with the supernatural to a degree, but the main focus is on the romance between the two main characters. Her Fearful Symmetry is a classic ghost story. The estranged aunt of two 21-year-old identical twins, Julia and Valentina, dies and leaves them her flat in London. The twins move into the flat, discover that it is haunted, and the plot sort of takes of from there. I

I really enjoyed this book; it combines the whole "classic ghost story" motif with really well-developed characters and a very clever plot, with a crazy twist near the end. Also, in my opinion, it's a huge testament to Niffenegger's skill as a writer that she can write two very different but equally excellent books. Interestingly, this book was not as popular as The Time Traveller's Wife. I didn't hear any rave reviews on it, I just stumbled upon it while browsing in Barnes and Noble. The hardback copies were 50% off and there were several left; it clearly was not a major seller, which confuses me, because her first book was so popular that I would have thought people would buy this just because it had her name on it. In any case, I would recommend it to anybody, with the caveat that if you're expecting another The Time Traveller's Wife, you're going to be disappointed. If you're just expecting a very well-written novel-plus-ghost-story, though, you will probably have as much fun with this book as I did!

Good Week :)

First of all, I fail at updating regularly. But I've had a really fantastic week and I wanted to gush about it over the internet a little.

Probably the best thing that happened this week was that I got a really good grade on my first physics exam . . . to be honest, it was one of the best science grades I've gotten in college. I usually try not to be a huge grade-bragger, mostly because the stuff I tend to get really brag-worthy grades in is stuff that comes easily to me (foreign languages, writing papers, the parts of science I happen to really "get" just by hearing about them the first time, etc.). Usually, in my pre-med classes, I feel like I'm busting my ass just to stay enough ahead of the curve to come out with a decent grade. But for this test, I worked really hard, invested a lot of time, and it payed off. And that makes me really happy.

Secondly, I found out this week that the scribe company I work for (my ER job) is starting a pilot program at First Hill, one of the Swedish campuses in Seattle. They're sending a few scribes over there to work with doctors and hopefully convince them that they want to pay to use scribes regularly, and I get to go! I'm really excited, and hopefully I will successfully impress the doctor . . . maybe I'll bake him brownies or something? Baking brownies is kind of my fallback plan for any situation that arises in my life.

Thirdly, I got a car! A 1993 burgundy Ford Taurus, that I have named Rufus. Rufus's two main virtues are that he runs, and that he was cheap. His main deficits are that his windshield is badly cracked (but even if you add in what it'll cost to get that fixed, he was still cheap), that he has leather interior (I don't believe in leather), and that the guy who owned him before me was apparently not a big fan of respiratory health, so he smells like cigarette smoke. But I drive with the window down, and I'm getting the interior cleaned ASAP, which will hopefully resolve that issue. I am so happy to have a car! Can we talk about taking the bus to the ER in Issaquah? And back? After 10:00 at night? Actually, never mind, let's not.

Tomorrow, Rufus and I are leaving for the Lake Quinault Lodge for the weekend, because my Aunt Marion and her fiance Mark are getting married on Saturday! They're getting married in the rainforest (yes, Washington has a rainforest, because we are rad), and everyone's dressing up in the theme of "Woodland Magic." I'm pretty excited. I'll post pictures when I get back.

Also, fall, especially in Seattle, especially on the UW campus, is gorgeous. That is all.

Photo from biggarphotography.com

Besalu Deliciousness

I went to Cafe Besalu, in Ballard, today, for the first time in a really long while. I'd forgotten how much I love it! My quasi-uncle Andy (he was actually my mother's best friend, they knew each other since high school, but he's like family), introduced me to it right after I moved to Seattle. He's been going there since they opened, so he knows the owner and a lot of the staff. The owner's name is James, he has a philosophy degree (random), and he's super nice. Anyway, Besalu has great coffee and DELICIOUS pastry. I had a blueberry danish today, and I also really love their ginger biscuits and nectarine tart . . . everything there is amazing. So go! They're closed for the next two weeks because James and his wife are going on vacation, but normally they're open Wednesday-Sunday from 7am-3pm. There's sometimes a really line, but it's well worth it, and also they're right next to the Java Bean, which also has really good coffee and shorter lines, so some people buy Java Bean coffee while they wait in line for Besalu (which has better coffee and infinitely better pastry).

"And what would happen to me, may I ask, if I loved all the children I said goodbye to?" (Mary Poppins)

I was thinking a lot about that quote today. It was the last day for many of the children in the prekindergarten class I've worked in almost every day for almost a year. I've gotten really, really attached to some of the kids, and it was hard for me to tell them goodbye. I think it was hard in a way for some of the kids, too, but they handled it the way five-year-olds handle a lot of things . . . by acting goofy and overexcited. One little girl spent the whole afternoon running away from me, jokingly refusing to give me a hug, acting like a little spaz when I tried to take a picture with her . . . and then right before her dad took her home for the day, she came and wrapped herself around my legs and said "Goodbye forever, Beatrice." I came very, very close to crying. I also came very, very close to making her father sign a legal contract that he would have me over to babysit, ("This is my phone number, here's my email. Call anytime. Seriously!"). The other time I almost cried was when I was giving a goodbye hug to a little boy I really love, and I guess my eyes were already welling up, cause he looked confused and said "Why does it look like you're going to cry?" Um, because you're adorable and I'm going to miss you like crazy, that's why!!

Another quote I've been thinking a lot about today:

"Never tell a young person that anything cannot be done. God may have been waiting centuries for someone ignorant enough of the impossible to do that very thing." ~G.M. Trevelyan

Animal Dreams by Barbara Kingsolver

I just finished this book; actually, I'm pretty sure it's been one of the major factors, second only to post-work exhaustion, that has kept me from unpacking at my new place over this past week. I loved it! It's earned a permanent spot on my bookshelf and on my "favorites" list. There is not a single person I wouldn't recommend it to.

The book is told, mostly from the point of view of Codi Noline, a woman in her thirties with an unconventional past, who is very uncertain of what she wants in life. The book begins when her younger sister, Hallie, from whom she has been inseparable since birth, moves to Nicaragua to do humanitarian work. After her sister leaves, Codi moves back to her hometown in rural Arizona to visit/set up care for her father, who has recently been diagnosed with Alzheimer's. Her father was a doctor and a single parent -- their mother died when they were little -- and he was always stern and distant. She didn't keep in touch with him in adulthood, so it's awkward for her to go back and see him now. Furthermore, when she arrives in Grace, her hometown, she discovers it's on the brink of an environmental crisis.

. . . that's really all the plot information I can share without giving too much away. I could never be a professional book reviewer. I always find it impossible to really describe why I think a certain book is good. I'm a Comparative Literature major, I can analyze books from here to next Christmas, but I can't seem to adequately describe why certain books tug on my heartstrings in ways that make me love them. I'll settle for sharing some of my favorite quotes from Animal Dreams:

"It's what you do that makes your soul, not the other way around."

"God, why does a mortal man have children? It is senseless to love anything this much."


"'Why do you suppose the poets talk about hearts?' he asked me suddenly. 'When they discuss emotional damage? The tissue of hearts is as tough as a shoe. Did you ever sew up hearts?'
"I shook my head. 'No, but I've watched. I know what you mean.' The walls of a heart are thick and strong, and the surgeons use heavy needles. It takes a good bit of strength, but it pulls together neatly. As much as anything, it's like binding a book.
"'The seat of human emotion should be the liver,' Doc Homer said. 'That would be an appropriate metaphor: we don't hold love in our hearts, we hold it in our livers.'
"I understand exactly. Once in ER I saw a woman who'd been stabbed everywhere, most severely in the liver. It's an organ with the consistency of layer upon layer of wet Kleenex. Every attempt at repair just opens new holes that tear and bleed. You try to close the wound with fresh wounds, and you try and you try and you don't give up until there's nothing left."


Incidentally, two other Kingsolver books that I really enjoyed are The Poisonwood Bible and The Bean Trees.